In the midst of what has turned out to be an incredibly horrid week... I do have something wonderful to be thankful for today. It's Lauren's birthday. And while I'm thankful for her everyday... today I'm doubly so!
Lauren is my mother's first cousin. Which I guess makes us second cousins. Or is it 1st cousins once removed? Or something like that. I never could keep all that straight. As a child, I adored Laurie. I loved her laughter, I loved her hugs, and I loved how she never made me feel like the annoying brat I probably was. She always told me how beautiful I was. And how much she loved my name. She listened to me in a way that most grown-ups didn't. She listened like the silly tales of a 1o year old was the most fascinating thing she'd heard all day. I loved how she made a fuss over me every time I saw her. I loved her for all those things, but what I probably loved most was that she was one of the few adults that never made a fuss about how tall I was getting. Perhaps since she's also tall, she understood. And as painfully shy about my height as I was, if I hadn't adored her already, she'd have become my hero simply for that reason alone.
After my great grandmother died, and then later after we moved to Pennsylvania, we didn't make the drive back to Columbia for Thanksgivings anymore. The last time I saw Laurie, I think I was about 13. Rachel was maybe six months old. Then in 2005, we had a mini family reunion at the beach. Lauren came with Rachel, and as soon as I walked in- there she was with that same smile and huge hug I remembered as a kid. (I must admit though... I was quite devastated and thoroughly dismayed when I hugged her back and realized that I was half an inch taller than her).
That week was one of the best memories of my life. We hit it off from the start, and spent many hours sitting on the beach, just talking. There are very few people that you meet that you have an instant connection with. I found myself telling Lauren things I hadn't told anyone before.
After we all were back home, I don't think three days had passed before I got an e-mail from her inviting me to move in with them. :) It took four years, but I finally took her up on it.
But during those years, she was there for me like no other person has ever been. She was the first person I called when something happened- good or bad. She was there for me when Emily died, and ever since. She's the one that finally made me take that step and go talk to a counselor. Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself. She knows when to push, and when to back off. She's more than a cousin. More than a best friend. More than a kindred spirit. More than a sister. She's all those things times ten.Lauren is one of those people that moves with a quiet grace, the kind that you don't always notice right away. She has a way of making people feel comfortable and loved. She has a smile that lights up a room, and a laugh that you can't help but join in with. She's beautiful- inside and out, even though she doesn't see it in herself as much as I think she should. She listens, she's patient, she encourages, and she has a heart bigger than anyone I know.
And now she's opened her house and has given me a place to stay. A place to start fresh. This past weekend when I got the news about Heather, she sat with me. Not saying a word. Just rubbing my back as I cried on her shoulder for an hour. She knew I didn't need words, or platitudes, or any of the other silly things people say. I just needed to know she was there.
I still marvel at how the grown up cousin I adored
as a little girl has become my closest confidante,
my bestest friend, and the older sister I never knew.
Today and everyday... I'm thankful for her.
Happy Birthday Lauren! I love you!
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