A month of Thanks- Sarah

Today I'm thankful for Sarah. I love that girl more than I could possibly say. From the moment she was born, she was "my" Sarah. We share the same middle name, Catherine, after our grandmother. I look at her now and can hardly believe that she's already 13. Seems like it was only yesterday I was taking her to the park to feed ducks that were bigger than she was. Now she pretty much can look me in the eye.

Sarah is a free-spirit. She's beautiful, she's funny, and I miss her. She's my beach buddy- she's the one that will get up and walk along the beach with me in the mornings when everyone's still asleep. She helps me look for sand dollars, and doesn't tease me about picking up every little piece I find.

I still laugh at a phone conversation between my mom and Aunt Pat. It was a long time ago- I think I was 18, and Sarah would've been about 5. I forget how the subject came up, but mom said something about me going to a wedding, but it came out sounding like I was going to my own wedding. So Aunt Pat started joking about me getting married. Sarah overheard her and got upset. She said that I couldn't get married because if I got married I wouldn't come play with her anymore.

It's eight years later, and she still seems to think I'm cool, and isn't embarrassed to be seen with me just yet. ;)

Vacation Highlights

Dad and I on the jetski. This was before the infamous oyster shell incident.

This is what happens when you don't wear shoes while on a jetski, tip said jetski because it's low tide, run into a bed of oysters, and don't listen to your dad when he tells you to pull your feet up and float. :)

Me and my Sarah

My Great Uncle Tom, my Grandma, and my Great Uncle John

My mom and our friend Eileen. I didn't get a picture of Mike and the amazing ribs he made for us. Yum.

Sarah, me, and Rachel at Planet Hollywood in Myrtle Beach

Long story- I was being anti-puzzle. This is a re-enactment of the moment I "caved".

My two favorite funny girls

Rachel and Sarah

Aunt Pat, Uncle Mike, and my parents at the winery.

Me and Sarah

Can't go to the beach without taking a pretty sky picture

Double Rainbow!




Uncle Mike and Sarah. The wind was blowing the sand across the beach. It was so very cool.

Sarah. Not that I'm biased, but doesn't she have the most beautiful smile?

'nuf said

Birthdays and bickering, loss and gain

It's hard to believe that a week has already flown by. This time a week ago I was chomping at the bit to get out of the office and on the road down here to Columbia. Now I'm sitting in the quiet of Laurie's living room lamenting that I'll have to leave in just three more days and wondering how on earth time goes so quickly.

Emily's been on my mind alot this week. Not that she isn't always, but especially so this week. My cousin Rachel reminds me of her in alot of ways. This visit even more so. Rach turned 14 yesterday. She's alot like Emily when it comes to her birthday. She's been counting down the days on facebook and telling everyone her birthday was this week, and bugging me relentlessly about what her mother bought her for her birthday. Since Laurie doesn't have any vacation time, Rachel and I got to spend her day together. We didn't really do much- we made a coffee cake yesterday morning, then we hit Starbucks and the mall. We were at Old Navy and Rachel talked me into buying a scarf. I'm not really a scarf person, but she convinced me that I didn't look like a complete fool. So I bought it. Still not 100% sure about the looking like a fool thing, but...

Spending the week with Rachel reminds me of having a little sister. Not that I'm looking for a surrogate by any means. No one can ever replace Emily. There is no one in this world like her. But maybe there's a part of my heart that can shift over a little bit. This week we've been bantering and teasingly bickering back and forth. I've missed it. I've missed that subtle art of being able to tease someone without crossing the line, because you know you can get away with it, because you're family and you know they're still going to love you.

I got a little teary-eyed yesterday too. I've got the phrase "Love Never Dies" on the background of my phone. Rachel showed me that she'd put the same thing on her phone.

I've missed having someone think I was cool enough to be copied.

Someone once told me that when God takes something away, He always gives you something else. Nothing can ever replace Emily. No one can ever fill that spot in my heart. But those little moments help soothe the rough edges around the hole. And it's not just with Rachel- when I'm with my cousin Sarah I often get the same feeling. Those girls remind me of what I've lost- but yet they also reminds me of what I still have.

Emily's birthday is this Sunday. I bought her a birthday card, but still don't know what to write in it. And I'll be spending the day in the car, driving back from South Carolina. In a way, I think that'll be a good way to spend the day. Thinking about her, missing her, and just.... remembering, I guess.

I'm really wishing I could capture time and hold it still for awhile.